Bloomberg Blew Nearly $1 Billion on His Hindenburg of a Campaign

According to a new filing with the Federal Election Commission, Michael Bloomberg spent way more money than previously thought in his successful bid to win a single delegate from American Samoa.

Bloomberg’s campaign for the Democratic nomination essentially began and ended on the same day: Super Tuesday. That was the first day he was officially on the ballot, and it was also the last day he was officially on the ballot. He closed up shop after a disastrous debut, and now he saunters in to MSNBC’s studios every now and again to pontificate on the coronavirus. Great show, guy. Ya really knocked it out of the park.

We’d love to see a monetary breakdown of how much it cost Bloomberg, per vote, to put up his pathetic Super Tuesday showing. But for now let’s content ourselves with how much actual money he spent: A whopping $935,360,675. Nearly $1 billion to build a political machine that lasted approximately as long as the Hindenburg…and came to the same, fatal conclusion.

This week, Bloomberg spent even more money, writing a check for $18 million to the DNC – the largest transfer in history from a personal campaign fund to the national party. Now that his own chances of winning the presidency have been dashed, apparently Bloomberg is ready to spend another fortune on a candidate with, oh, about the same chances of defeating Trump in November. Granted, those calculations could change depending on how the rest of this year goes (and rarely have we lived through a more uncertain time), but c’mon. Do the American people really want Joe Biden to lead us through the backside of this crisis?

Joe Biden?

Well, stranger things have happened, we suppose, but let’s get back to Bloomberg. According to the AP, he is throwing his money all over the Democratic machine in the hopes of getting Trump out of office. He’s burning up money in an effort to register Hispanics to vote, he’s building up the DNC’s coffers, and we’re sure he’ll be pouring his fortune eagerly into his anti-gun initiatives. Okay, nothing too surprising…except…

…Except, wouldn’t this be an excellent time for a philanthropic billionaire to focus his wealth on the coronavirus response? Health officials at New York City hospitals are sounding the red alarm, telling the public that they won’t have nearly enough beds and equipment to deal with the tsunami of COVID-19 patients they expect to see over the next month. Maybe Michael Bloomberg is secretly donating millions to help them stave off that future, but as far as we can see, he seems much more interested in “beating Trump” than he does in beating the virus. Strange priorities.

Alas, this seems to be a guy who likes wasting his money on frivolous causes. Guess that’s his right.