Michigan Muslim Sues Little Caesars for this ABSURD Reason

A Muslim man in Dearborn, Michigan is suing Little Caesars for $100 million based on a claim that a local outlet sold him pizza with pepperoni made with pork instead of the halal beef pepperoni he had requested. Mohamad Bazzi says he ordered pizzas labeled “halal” from the establishment twice in the last half of May, but the pizzas themselves had pork pepperoni toppings. Under Islamic law, pork is prohibited under any circumstances.

“It’s really upsetting,” said Bazzi’s lawyer. “My clients want the public to know. Especially during Ramadan, it would be a travesty if Muslims in Dearborn bought pizza from Little Caesars and discovered they were eating pork.”

Eating the meat of a pig, said the attorney, is “one of the worst sins you can” commit in the Islamic tradition.

That makes us wonder where “blowing one’s self and others up with a bomb” fits in the pantheon of Islamic sins. Worse than eating pork? Not as bad? What if you accidentally blow up a pig in your terrorist attack? Is the killing of the pig the sin or just the eating? Can we get a Muslim scholar to weigh in on these matters?

Bazzi claims that he was duped into eating the evil Pig Pizza once on May 20 and then again on May 24. Now, we aren’t clerics or anything, but if eating pork is “one of the worst sins” in Islam, why would you deliberately take that risk only four days after being fooled the first time? Little Ceasars is a fine establishment, but is their pizza really THAT good that you would risk eternal damnation just to get that greasy goodness? If so, they should probably use this in their commercials. LITTLE CEASARS: So Tasty You’ll Trade Everlasting Life For It!

There may be more to the story than meets the eye. Apparently, the store’s employees claim that Bazzi – knowing full well that the pizzas had pork pepperoni on them – asked them to put the “halal” sticker on the box anyway. The implication, of course, being that Bazzi was running a special scam in honor of Ramadan and hoping to fund his mandatory trip to Mecca with some of that sweet, sweet lawsuit money. Bazzi’s lawyer denies the claim.

The usual observations about Islam and the West aside, it’s not up to the local pizza place to make sure you stay within the guidelines of your religious beliefs. And frankly, if your religion has more to say about eating pig meat than about terrorism, you might want to do some soul-searching.

Or, you know, make the really hard sacrifice next time and just order a cheese pizza.